To someone :)

"To the guy I hurt two years ago.

The only reason why I did what I had to do is because I didn't want to prolong your agony. I saw how unhappy you were with me, how I couldn't give what you wanted... how I felt like the relationship we were forming would soon become destructive. 

There is something I could never bring myself to admit - to you, to my friends, to my family, to anyone. Not even to myself. When asked by friends, ""what do you look for in a guy?,"" trust me, nothing I say would ever point to you. Simply put, you were not and are still not my type.
But in the fast course we took to being friends, I am not going to lie: you made me very happy. There was something just so different about you, and up until today, I still can't put a finger on what it is.

I never thought anything of our friendship or how affected I would be of and by it. But through your small efforts to your grand gestures, I started to wonder if anything would ever come out of this.

But in a span of our relationship, I'd lie if I say you never made me happy because you did and I will be forever thankful for that but we drifted apart for reasons I don't even care to find out anymore, because I don't want to keep thinking about what could have been. I'm not mad at you at all, I'm just extremely saddened by the fact that it ended or that it is ending the way it is. 

Please don't think I took you for nothing, because honestly, I never did. It hurts to think you think of me in that way--that mean, nasty, bitch who butchered your heart to pieces. Believe me, the last thing I would want to do is to hurt you (but sadly, I did). We've been friends prior to all these dramas and it saddens me that know we just pass by each other like we're complete and total strangers.

Please know that I always wish for you to be okay. Please know that I'm happy at where you are right now. I know you have someone else in your life (My college friends kept tabs on you through your FB), and that's great.

I know for sure that things will never go back to the way they were before, and this makes me quite sad. But I know I will get past this, just as you already have. And for what it's worth, I'd just like to say: Thank you for everything.I'm really glad you've found someone who makes you smile... someone who manages to bright up your day, to make you feel loved, to make you feel special--someone who isn't me.

I wish you the best. Always.

I miss our friendship, sadly. But I know it will never be the same anymore. I know it was completely my fault that this happened.

I'm always going to be sorry. And to be honest, deep down, I really liked you. You were different. But I was too scared. So, don't let her go okay? Be happy with her. You know you deserve it more than anything. "

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